Editing Beasts and Hunters

Jessica is continuing work on revisions to Orphaned Gods Book 1, Beasts and Hunters. The first draft of this book is pretty old–won’t say how many years–so the characterization is off in lots of places, and some things about the world and the magic system have changed since the early days. Chapters 1-7 in particular needed complete reworking of many scenes, deletion of others, and some new additions. She’s working on chapter 12 right now, and the chapters in the second half of the book aren’t needing such extensive changes. Here’s a snippet from chapter 4.

A clatter at the door of the coffeeshop announced the entrance of someone in a hurry. Aturi turned just as Ubashi called out, “Ready to go, lads? We don’t have a moment to spare.”

“You’re alive,” Aturi said, with relief. And uninjured, seemingly. “Did you find—?”

Ubashi cut him off, sweeping into their little alcove. “I’ve booked us passage on a fast ship. We leave with the tide, which is—”

“Just past noon,” Livalii said. She always knew about tides, and boats, and things like that. “Which leaves everyone sufficient time to explain themselves.” She gave Ubashi a dubious glance, then looked across the table at Tiiro. “I take it this is the crazy old Han Khiru mage?”

Ubashi seemed to notice Livalii for the first time. “Well, hello there.” For a man who didn’t have a moment to spare, he spent several long moments looking Livalii up and down. “Do I smell the warm air of the islands? I wasn’t expecting to meet a Fanaloan flower so far from its native shore.”

Tiiro rolled his eyes. “I’m Fanaloan, too.” He introduced them with a vague wave.

“Livalii, this is Mage Ubashi. Ubashi, Livalii.”chapter four of Beasts and Hunters illustration by S.A. Hannon

“Literally named after a flower.” Ubashi clasped his hands together. “How charming! I haven’t visited Fanaloa this lifetime, but I do recall the highlights. Laholo, my dear.”

“It’s Lahora.” Tiiro sighed. “And pretty much everything in Fanaloa is named after a flower or a fish.”

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